Titans of Justice Unlimited Chapter 28 – “Disco Inferno Part 1”
Written by: Scotty2Hotty
Edited by: Power Guy


Card Queen Novelty Co., Japan…

Duela Dent looked at the clock. It was after five and she promised she wouldn’t work past 4:30 today. “I’d better hurry, don’t want to keep Rio waiting.” she thought aloud as she grabbed her purse and hurried out the door, locking it behind her. Her other staff had all gone home and lately Duela found herself having to spend more time away from the Card Queen Novelty Company caring for her fragile nephew, Rio.

Rio had made great strides with his therapy and although his memory wasn’t 100%, he was functioning at least. Duela had hired a aide named Kahura to help care for her nephew. Duela couldn’t be home all the time--she was CEO of Asia’s best selling novelty company, but tonight she was celebrating Rio’s birthday and he asked to go to the best sushi bar in town. “That kid can really put it away.” she mused as she hailed a cab.

The cab made its way through the busy streets and Duela gazed out the window at the sea of neon. She had been able to live in Japan in relative obscurity until she met Wonder Man and Jemstone who introduced her to her nephew who had been duped into being a mischief maker called Wildcard.

On the sidewalk, Kahura and Rio could see the cab approaching.

“Kahura! Look, here comes Aunt Duela!” Rio exclaimed.

“I see her. I told you she wouldn’t forget.” Kahura assured the young man.

Although Rio had been undergoing all manner of therapy to undo the abuse of Eric Raymond, he was still childlike and easily mixed up. Sometimes he couldn’t discern reality from his fantasy world. Duela waved to her nephew through the window as a commotion broke out. A young boy raced down the street carrying several women’s handbags.

“Stop him!” shouted a police officer.

Duela didn’t notice the trouble as she exited the cab and the boy ran right into her.

“Whoa there, champ. Those purses are all wrong for you.” She smiled grabbing the boy’s arm.

“Aunt Duela! Be careful!” Rio shouted, agitated. Kahura placed her hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him down.

Just then the boy produced a club from inside his pants and struck Duela in the head. She staggered and passed out as the boy fled. By now, a crowd had gathered and the several police officers chased the boy while a lone officer summoned help for Duela.

“Duela! Duela, wake up! It’s my birthday…you can’t….Kahura..why won’t she wake up!? She’ll miss the party!!!” Rio pleaded, his eyes darting.

Kahura’s voice was calm. “Rio, calm down. Remember your breathing. Ok? Now, the police will get your aunt some help. I’m sure she will be ok. I promise.”

Rio broke away from the dark haired beauty. “NO!!! They hurt my aunt just like they made me hurt J…Jerrica….” he stammered as he lept into the air.

In that moment, all of the results of his therapy were gone and the Wildcard persona was back. He laughed like a hyena and grabbed a pole extending from a building. “No one ruins my birthday and hurts Auntie! I know just how to make this right again! WOOOOO HOOOOOO!!!!!!!” And with that he disappeared into the night.

The officer said, “Who is he!?”

Kahura explained the situation as an ambulance arrived for Duela. She boarded the ambulance with her comatose employer and produced a cell phone looking for Jerrica Benton’s phone number.

***

Days later at the Hall of Justice…

The Arachnid sat at the monitor panel bored beyond belief. The young man craved adventure and excitement which monitor duty didn’t quite provide. He thought about the recent additions to the team and how Phantom Lady annoyed him with her assumptions. “She’s got a banging body, but boy is she too quick to judge.” he mused as he remembered how she thought he and Starman were a couple. “And how she goes on and on about her hairy-chested hunks. “YUCK! What a loon!”

Just then he heard a noise. “Finally, someone is here to keep me company.” he thought as he spun his chair around. He was shocked to see a white faced man in some sort of clown get-up before him.





“Whoa! If you’re looking for the kiddie birthday party it’s not here.” he sneered.

The white faced, green haired man stared him and cocked his head. “It’s my birthday. Not some kid’s. And he ruined it. YOU ruined it!”

The Arachnid realized something wasn’t quite right with the man and suddenly realized who he was. “You’re Jem’s old boy toy. The really messed up one.”

“And you are a dirty bug!” Wildcard said as he pulled a huge aerosol can from his bag. The can read “Black Flag”.

“Stay out of my way, bug-boy or you’ll be checking into the nearest roach motel.” Wildcard’s face was scarier than Arachnid imagined. His mouth was painted a garish red and there was lipstick on his teeth. He couldn’t tell if those were actual black circles around his eyes or make up.

Arachind was about to summon help as Wildcard sprayed the can at his face.

“Uh uh, my little science project.” He whispered as he sprayed the contents of the bottle at the young hero.

“AGHHHH!!!! Arachnid screamed as he felt his skin boil and blister and his vision blurred. He stepped forward and swung at Wildcard, missing. Wildcard then brought down both fists on Arachnid’s head, cracking his skull.

“I warned you. I warned you, but you didn’t listen. I have to have my birthday party but it’s not a party without Auntie….ha…ha…HAHAHHAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!” Wildcard cackled jumping up and down, clapping.

“Now, where is it? He said as he made his way to the trophy room. Lining the hall were portraits of the team. He stopped for a moment gazing at a portrait of Jemstone.

“Jerrica…what am I doing here? We need to be at the record shop making sure your album outsells the Misfits---Aggghhhh!!!” He screamed as pain seared through his brain.

He then saw Wonder Man’s portrait. Wildcard became quiet and took a large scalpel from his bag, slashing the portrait to ribbons.

He then surveyed all the relics in the trophy room. A few minutes passed and he found what he was looking for. “Here it is, Aunt Duela! Now the party can begin!!” he giggled as he broke the glass case containing a very special item. Beneath it was inscribed ‘The Time Commander’s Hourglass’.

Wildcard went back to the monitor room. Arachnid was convulsing and thrashing all over the floor.

“Hmph, and they told me this was quick working!” Wildcard angrily shouted as he sprayed the tormented boy once again. This time he became still.

“Now, for the party! Let’s see, who shall I invite!? I know!! All of Auntie’s old friends!!!! She would want friends at my party.” Wildcard looked up at the monitor board browsing the photos of all the active Titans.

His gloved fingers were nimble on the keyboard as he said aloud, “Robin, Kid Flash, Bumblebee, Aqualad, Speedy--ugh, maybe Auntie will tell that jerk off, and Wonder Girl!”

While he saw former members of his aunt’s team of Teen Titans, in actuality he selected Nightvision, Flash, Queen Bee, Whirlpool, Trickshot, and the alternate earth version of Wonder Girl. He kissed the hourglass and activated the springs in his shoes as he bounced across Arachnid’s body and out the door.

***

New York City…

The mysteriously summoned Titans had assembled.

‘What’s this all about? I get an alert to come to New York and everything seems fine.” The Flash said impatiently.





“And I was on my way to meet up with Wonder Man and Wonder Warrior for a party with all the A-listers!” Wonder Girl said, tossing her pony tail.





“That’s enough.” Nightvision said. “Something’s going on or we all wouldn’t have been called here.”





“You better bet something’s happening Robin-OOOOOOO!” a voice cackled from atop a building.

The assembled heroes looked up.

“The Joker!?” Nightvision gasped.

‘Not quite, legs but close enough, hooooo haaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!” the clownish man howled. “I’m the Joker’s Daughter’s Nephew!”

“That’s Wildcard! Wonder Man and Jemstone told me about him! But, he’s supposed to be in Japan getting treatment for his problems.” Wonder Girl said drawing her lasso. “His aunt was a Teen Titan years ago.”

Trickshot drew her bow. “I know all about his aunt. She doesn’t care for heroes of the bow and arrow type.”





“You’ve had your fun, laughing boy. Come quietly and we’ll make sure no charges are pressed.” Whirpool said diplomatically.





“Charges? But this is a party…a roller disco inferno party. The Great Frog---I want them to play…why…why are you all being so mean? Aunt Duela?” Wildcard said as he buried his face in his hands.

Just then the Titan’s emergency frequency buzzed. Queen Bee was the first to answer. “Queen Bee here.”





On the other end was the Huntress. “Guys, something’s happened! I arrived at the Hall for my shift and someone really worked over the Arachnid. He’s alive, but barely. It looks like some sort of chemical attack--and the trophy room’s been ransacked!”





“What’s missing?” Nightvision demanded.

Before the Huntress could speak, Wildcard chimed in. “Here’s what’s missing chump!”

Wildcard held the Time Commander’s hourglass high above his head. “Who’s ready to party!!!?’ he shrieked as the Titans noticed the very cityscape change around them. Cars reverted to models not seen since the 1970s. Modern buildings disappeared and the ones remaining suddenly turned psychedlic. Street lamps turned into disco balls and the city streets suddenly became covered with shag carpet. Pedestrians were shocked as their clothes became polyester retro fashions. All cell phones, Ipods, palm pilots--anything modern disappeared.

“Now the party can begin!!! Hope you like Donna Summer!” Wildcard waved his arms as the first notes of “Hot Stuff” came from nowhere.

“Alright, you’ve had your fun. Stop this insanity at once.” Trickshot said as she grabbed her boxing glove arrow.

“A boxing glove?” Wonder Girl laughed.

“It may be one of my dumber arrows, but it’s more than enough for a loser like this.” Trickshot grinned.

‘Wait!” Nightvision shouted. “He’s obviously more dangerous than he looks!”

“I’ll get him!” The Flash said as she whizzed past the in-flight boxing glove arrow.

“An impatient one, I see! Don‘t worry Kid Flash, there‘s cake for all!” Wildcard said he threw something towards the racing woman. Despite her speed, the object struck her ankles and quickly wrapped around them. The Flash screamed out as she saw the object was a barbed wire of some sort that dug into her ankles as blood gushed.

Wildcard dodged the arrow and pointed his fist at Trickshot. He pressed a button and a large beach ball hurtled towards the archer. “Better catch it Speedy! Don’t want it to hit the ground and blow up!”

Trickshot caught the ball only to feel her hands start burning. She screamed as she dropped the ball and saw her blistered hands.

“I lied! No explosives there, but maybe you should start soaking in Palmolive Roy-boy! That’s for being such a meanie, you drug addled crack-head!”

Whirlpool said, “Do you hear him? He thinks we’re the Teen Titans!”

“I did. We’ve got to get that hourglass away from him--and no one go flying off half cocked.” Nightvision quietly said as Queen Bee tried to get the barbed wires out of Flash’s ankles.

Wonder Girl couldn’t get Trickshot to show her her hands. “You mean this powerless freak has already taken down two of us? What kind of team are we?” Wonder Girl announced.

“A team of big fat zeros if you ask me!” Wildcard seemed to pop out of nowhere and slammed a giant anvil with ‘ACME’ emblazoned on it into Nightvision’s head, promptly dropping him to the ground.

“Get him!” Whirlpool shouted. The three remaining Titans gave chase to the laughing man.

“Aqualad, I hope you’re ready for the disco inferno!” Wildcard said glancing back at the Atlantean running behind him.

“Sorry, we don’t dance that much in Atlantis.” he replied.

“Atlantis, Atlantis, Atlantis! You all think you’re better than my aunt because of your fancy powers! Bah, you’re nothing tuna boy! I‘ve heard how the Teen Titans all think you are one lame salmon.”

Whirlpool was on Wildcard and landed a few punches, busting Wildcard’s mouth. Blood covered his already unsettling face.

“Stay down!” Whirlpool demanded as Wonder Girl and Queen Bee joined him.

“Oh, big bad Aqualad beat lil’ ol’ me! And you’re supposed to be the inferior one!” Wildcard said he bit down on a capsule in his mouth and thrashed around. His bloodshot eyes even rolled back into his head.

“Oh God! He’s taken something!” Queen Bee screamed. Whirlpool bent over and slapped Wildcard’s cheeks. “Come on man, don’t die!”

“Oh I won’t, Wildcard said as he blew a fine dust into Whirlpool’s face. “I know all about the hydro-asian flu! That’s the fast acting variety!”

Whirlpool suddenly fell sick.” I thought this was gone….no longer existed…..” he said falling over.

“The hourglass…he must have used it to get the flu sample.” Wonder Girl uttered.

“Right-O, Wonder Doll! Now will you two join me for the Hustle? How about some Elton John?”

“How about you shut up!” Queen Bee said, reaching for the hourglass. As she put her hand on it, Wildcard touched her shoulder electrocuting her. She dropped to the ground.

“Joy buzzer to kill the kill-joy!!!!!!!!HAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!” Wildcard was laughing so hard he cried.


“Laugh all you want, you’re facing an Amazon now!” Wonder Girl said pummeling the man with her fists. Wildcard tried to fight back, but couldn’t. Wildcard was on the ground, his breathing heavy. “You…you witch! You ruined my party.” He reached up trying to grab the teen amazon and latched onto her belt.

“No! Don’t touch that!!” she cried.

“Why? Is it Neiman Marcus?”

Wildcard gave the belt a big tug removing it. His eyes grew wide as the beautiful teenager turned into a grotesque, deformed, cripple.

“d**n. Aphrodite didn’t bless you after all. How did you look so pretty? Maybe it’s Maybelline!” Wildcard said pulling himself up.

Princess Donna lay on the ground sobbing. “My…my belt…puh….please…..” she cried trying to grab the golden belt.

“Uh uh uh, acne girl….you betrayed my aunt! You made her miss my birthday!” his face grew menacing as he stomped the sobbing girl’s face. “Not like I can make her any uglier!” he chuckled.

“Now, the party can really start!!!!!!! AUNNNNTTTT DUUUUEELLLLAAA!!!!! Come out, come out wherever you are! I brought your old friends! Now we can kill them together!!!!!!!!!!!”